8 Secrets for Selling to Women

by Jane-Michele Clark

With women being responsible for +85% of purchases (either directly or through their influence), particularly in the B2C category, it’s essential that companies learn what makes women tick (in terms of sales, at least – smile).

To hear excerpts from a talk on selling to women that was delivered to a group of car dealers, please
click here to play.

With women being responsible for +85% of purchases (either directly or through their influence), particularly in the B2C category, it’s essential that companies learn what makes women tick (in terms of sales, at least – smile).

Many marketers believe that men and women should be treated identically in the sales process. Prospects get clustered into personality types based on demographics (age, gender, ethnicity, etc.), social style, communication patterns and life stage (recent grad, newly married, empty-nester, etc.) – and then get treated according to what seems appropriate for that cluster.

We’ve also all been taught (with good reason) that in selling it’s important to provide the information in the way the customer wants it. That’s why sales courses teach company reps to also determine if the prospect...

• is visual, kinesthetic, or auditory;

• wants lots of information in order to make a purchase decision, or is someone who prefers just the highlights;

• wants to build friendships or is a “just the facts, ma’m” kind of person (think ‘amiable’, ‘social’ and other personality types), etc.

There’s also no question that, in addition, there are levels of service that every customer expects and deserves (to be treated fairly, with respect, etc.). The mistake many marketers make though, is to stop there.

The fact remains that women and men are different; how each defines being treated fairly and with respect is different. (Any man who has ever been on the receiving end of a woman’s “fine”, knows what I’m talking about.) As a result, the approach and processes may need to be amended slightly for women and men within each of the subsets you use for classifying your clients and prospects. I’m not trying to complicate your lives, but there is a reason why there are so many men and women jokes.

Eight Secrets for Selling to Women

1. Greet me; don’t jump me. When a woman enters a store or showroom, she likes to be greeted – and then given some time to acclimatize. If you approach too quickly to ask, “May I help you?” the most likely response will be, “No thanks; I’m just looking.” (Translation: “Leave me alone to browse by myself.”) Nearly 25% of women are so put off by the immediate pounce that they will leave the store within 2 – 3 minutes, and look for the item elsewhere. The best approach is to smile and nod a friendly greeting, wait about 4 – 5 minutes then approach and introduce yourself by saying, “Hi. My name is ____. I’d just like to say hello and let you know I’ll be over there if you have any questions.” If she has questions, or needs help, most women will ask at this point. Give her a moment to respond, then smile, look her in the eye and retreat. If you hover, you will alienate her and likely lose her.

2. Don’t discount me. Car showrooms and industrial trade shows are most often cited as the places where women feel they are not given serious consideration. Said one woman, “I wanted an Audi TT – yet the salesman kept pushing another car on me. He kept saying how the other car was a better one for me, going on about the special financing on it and ignoring the fact that I wanted the TT. I had to go elsewhere to get what I wanted.” Another senior executive recounts the frustration she feels when attending tradeshows: “I’ve purchased millions of dollars of industrial equipment on behalf of our company and its subsidiaries, yet when I go to a tradeshow, if the manufacturer's rep doesn’t know me personally, or doesn’t immediately recognize the company name, I get monosyllabic answers to my questions. It’s as if they are waiting for me to leave so they can serve the important – male – visitors.” These women echoed the sentiments of many: If a woman is in a store, or in a showroom, or at a tradeshow, sales reps should assume she is there to buy, that she is qualified to purchase and should treat her accordingly. Which leads to the next point.

3. Give us the information we request. When most women ask a question, they prefer to be given an explanation along with the answer. Women don’t like having to pull answers from sales reps – so don’t make them work for the info. Further, many women express anger at not being given brochures when they request them. This appears to be especially problematic in car dealerships and electronics retailers. If you are asked for a brochure, get the literature, hand it over… and then start to ask the qualifying questions.

Remember, too, that women and men use brochures differently. Most women will read brochures on products they’re interested in. More importantly, nearly three quarters of women surveyed indicate they will use brochures to compare multiple products they are interested in – and if they didn’t get a brochure for one of the makes on their list, there’s far less chance that it will get the final nod. (And no, don’t start thinking that they can just go and print the specs from the website; very few women will go to that trouble to include the product in their consideration.) Hint: If you are serving a couple, make sure you hand the brochure to the woman. The only exception to this “rule”: pick-up trucks and powerboats.

4. Be polite, not patronizing – and don’t assume that I’m stupid or haven’t done my homework. That about says it all. Actually, it doesn’t. For a woman, being polite is more than remembering your please and thank-yous, and adopting a friendly tone (and yes, we women read more into tone than orchestra conductors) – it means listening when we talk. Too often women feel like men tune them out a bit when talking because the men are focusing more on what they will say next, than on the content being conveyed. Force yourself to pay attention to what the woman is saying, don’t interrupt and then feedback what she has told you so that she knows you have heard (obviously you won’t do this every time, but enough so that she doesn’t walk away asking, “Was he even listening to me?!”)

5. If I haven’t asked for your advice, don’t tell me what I need. Women prefer to be asked questions about what they need, how they would like to use the product, etc. Once there has been some discussion, women will welcome a sales rep’s input – but not before.

6. Phony friendly won’t fly. One woman summed up a common complaint by saying, “Don’t try to make friends with me by telling me stories about yourself right off the bat. Don’t try to manipulate me with the ‘feel/ felt/ found’ routine. Don’t touch my arm to bond with me. Just be respectful and let me share as much as I choose with you.” The message is clear: If there truly is common ground, use it to build rapport. Otherwise, professional, courteous, friendly and informative are the way to go.

7. Keep your word. When a sales rep promises to call, or to send materials, it is especially important to follow-through on the commitment. Men are far more sanguine about lack of follow-up; for a woman it can be a deal breaker. What happens after the sale is important for future sales and referrals, which leads to the one final point:

8. Appreciate my business. Everyone likes to be thanked for their patronage. Women, in particular, expect the appreciation to be heartfelt. At very least, there should be a sincere thank you with a smile at check-out. A thank you note following a major purchase touches the right chord– but it must be a handwritten, actual card to be welcomed. A mass-mailed form letter can actually have a detrimental effect. A thank you phone call is generally not viewed as a true thank you, but rather with some suspicion (“How fake!”, or “What do they want to sell me now?” are the comments we hear frequently). The only time the call is appreciated is when the stated purpose of the call is to ensure that the product is working fine and to see if the woman has any questions or concerns. After that part of the call, a reiteration of the thank you is welcomed – provided the person doesn’t sound as though he or she is reading from a script.

Clearly, the expression, “it’s not what you say so much as how you say it” is especially true when you are selling to women.


Jane-Michèle Clark is president of The Q Group ( www.theQgroup.com ), a strategic positioning and marketing communications firm that has worked with many blue chip companies over the past 30 years. Jane-Michèle also teaches MBA level marketing at the Schulich School of Business, is a corporate trainer and speaker, business coach and 9-time nominee for the Canadian Woman Entrepreneur of the Year Award. Jane-Michèle can be reached atjmc@theQgroup. or by calling 416-424-4233.

Copyright © 2005, Jane-Michèle Clark. All rights reserved


Jane-Michèle Clark is president of The Q Group ( www.theQgroup.com ), a strategic positioning and marketing communications firm that has worked with many blue chip companies over the past 30 years. In addition to being seasoned business strategist and marketing expert, Jane-Michèle also teaches MBA level marketing at the top-ranked Schulich School of Business York University). Jane-Michèle is also a corporate trainer and speaker and 9-time nominee for the RBC Canadian Woman Entrepreneur of the Year Award.

Jane-Michèle can be reached at jmc@theQgroup. or by calling 416-424-6644.


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